I implore you to put down your phone for five seconds and take stock of what's going on around you. I think it's safe to say that we have collectively lost ourselves. You can boil down most of what you see on social media as flailing against the infinite void of reality and trying to find some small piece of ground to stand on. How did we get here? How can we fix this?
I think that one of the largest reasons that we have gotten here is the massive amount of stimulation that we're bombarded with on a daily basis. I mean, apps are literally designed to activate the reward center of your brain. Look at the animations that play in gambling machines and when you open loot boxes in video games. They're full of bright colors and vivid animations. With this in mind, take a look at the design of anything for children: toys, cereal, books, tv shows, etc. You'll find that baby toys are always in bright vibrant colors. This is to attract the baby's attention and get them to play with the toy. The companies that design these gambling systems are quite literally playing on our own psychology to get us addicted. Now, not everyone has the same level of susceptibility to this. There's always going to be someone that's able to cash out any amount of winnings before they lose it all, but most people cannot do that. I think the saddest example of this is the lines of elderly people at the machines in Vegas just pissing away any and all of the money they have. It's sad, but the reality is that they're bored and they probably feel like their life has lost meaning. So the only thing left to do is stay in a stimulated state to escape the pain of those thoughts. While this was a lite example and was focused mainly on gambling, you can extend it to any and all addictive activities/substances.
By staying in a constantly distracted state, we're slowly drowning out and maybe even killing our inner voice. The little thoughts that tell us that we should be doing something more than our life than free wheeling on porn, weed, and video games. This gradually leaves us feeling unsatisfied because we're not doing what we really truly want or think we should be doing. This feeling builds and builds and builds until one day, something breaks. We might snap at a loved one or may find ourselves having a panic attack in the grocery store. Now, I'm not saying that this disconnect is the cause of all mental health problems (it's certainly not), but it definitely doesn't help us. When we get to this point, our body tries to warn us that we are in danger, but it doesn't know how to do it. The only thing it can do is give us a sense of fear and trigger that fight or flight response. The longer that you ignore the problem, the worse the symptoms will get. The changes come on slowly and you may not even notice it happening at first. You might feel a little more irritated somedays at the start. Then you may notice that things that used to make you happy don't feel good anymore. This is usually where people start to notice that something is wrong, but most will ignore it and continue to try and do those same things. This starts a spiral where people try to hunt for something that can make the feeling go away. I don't feel the need to finish where that cycle can end up because I'm sure (unfortunately) that we all know someone who has reached the dark ends of that cycle. The only thing to do is to be aware of ourselves and catch when we've started down that slippery slope.
Once you have noticed that you're on that downward slope, it's paramount to try and get your footing as soon as possible. You can do this by asking yourself "Why am I doing this? Does this activity bring me closer to achieving my goals? Do I know that I will regret doing this tomorrow?" Once you start asking yourself these questions, you'll find that you're better able to control yourself when the temptations arise. Now, I'm not saying and I cannot advocate going total "Monk Mode". It's simply not sustainable or beneficial for most people. It's the same reason why most diets don't work. If you cut yourself off of the things that you enjoy entirely, you'll just be miserable. All that it means is if you're someone who browses TikTok for hours on end, you might set a timer on your phone to alert you after you've been in the app for 30 minutes. If you normally smoked or drank everyday after work, maybe you only do it on the weekends now. The point is to not restrict yourself to the point of being miserable but to make yourself consciously aware of the decision to do that activity every single time you do it. You may find that you naturally become less inclined to do that activity as you become more mindful of your behaviors. This itself causes another problem though. After you've removed or reduced these behaviors you no longer find value in, what do you replace them with?
I think the easiest thing to start doing is to increase your overall activity level. This can be as simple as going on a 15 minute walk outside. Maybe you eventually start going to a gym and lifting some weights or using the machines. There is just something profound that happens when you show up and do something difficult. Working out is hard and most people don't want to go to the gym. But the days that you don't want to go are usually the ones where you'll benefit the most. Another thing to start to do is to journal. Journaling is a great way to bring some order to the pandemonium within our minds. There's just something cathartic about releasing what you're thinking about onto the poor unsuspecting pages. Take care to avoid going into a negative spiral here; it's easy to slip from a productive outlet to ranting and raving.
Anyway, this was just something that I was thinking about while I was out on a walk this afternoon. It's also a journey that I'm currently on myself. I'm working on showing up and being active in my life more days, but I'm not where I want to be just yet. I just wanted to put something out into the void and hopefully give someone else comfort that they aren't alone in this journey and that they shouldn't be ashamed of where they're at in life. Remember to stop and think and ask if the things and people in your life are truly benefiting you and making you a better person. If they aren't, it's worth considering a change. I hope you find some peace and happiness on your journey.